I gave this talk in church today. I meant to tell this story on my blog a long time ago, but I guess I forgot. The link to the origin of this talk is here:
3rd grade campout.
In May of 2009, we were living in
Juneau, AK. My daughter London brought
home a field trip permission form from her 3rd grade teacher, Mr.
Wyatt, requesting permission for her to attend a 3-day, 2-night campout with
the entire 3rd grade that would cost me $40! My first thoughts were a) I wasn’t going to
let her go, and b) what a lot of money for a third grade field trip! As I was contemplating what to do, Mr. Wyatt called
and asked me if I could come and be a "camp counselor" which I
interpreted as...please help us wrangle 45, eight and nine year old children
for three days. All three days of the
campout were geared towards teaching the kids how to thrive (and survive) in
the Alaska wilderness.
On the second day of the campout, the
teachers broke the kids into four groups and had prepared four separate hour-long
activities for the kids to participate in.
Mr. Wyatt asked me and another parent to lead the nature hike. He had the trail all mapped out and had marked
specific places for us to stop along the way and present information and
thinking experiences for the kids. He
told us he would guide us part of the way with the first group, but then we
would be on our own for the rest of the day. It didn’t seem too bad, there was
a definite trail, and part of the hike was on a raised boardwalk. Our first stop was along the muddy bank of a small
stream. We lead the children in a
discussion about beavers and then went on a scavenger type hunt looking for
trees that had been toppled by beavers.
It was fun to watch their minds work on this activity. We started hiking again, and came to what can
only be described as a dense forest of budding devil's club with a rocky path
through it. Devil’s Club is a very spiny,
prickly plant that grows in abundance in the forests of Alaska. The spines of Devil's club break off easily
if you brush up against them and can embed themselves into your skin causing
infection, localized heat, inflammation, pain, and redness.
The other mom and I were walking towards the
back of the group and talking about how glad we were that there was a wide path
through the thick devil’s club forest, when Mr. Wyatt turned sharply to the
right and started leading the children up the side of the mountain THROUGH the
thick devil's club! We were pretty sure
he was crazy! We both watched him for a
minute, trying to figure out how far he was going to go, and trying to decide
if we might be able to skip this part of the hike with the next three
groups. After he got to about 100 yards
away, we decided we had better follow him.
He stopped about 100 yards further up the mountain, and then lead the
kids in a really neat discussion about the old growth forest we were standing
in. When he was done talking, he gave
the kids 5 minutes to explore on their own.
I walked right up to him and asked him if he was crazy. How were we supposed to bring all these kids
up here without them getting thorns stuck all over them? This is where I learned something. He told me that the kids had all been taught
on a previous field trip how to "dance with the devil's club". They had had an expert come in and teach the
kids how to navigate through all the thorny devil's club, because that
particular plant is very prevalent in that area, and it was a skill that they
would need in the outdoors of Alaska. I
listened as the kids were hiking back down, and none of them were complaining
(like me). They were all excited that
they knew how to dance with the devil's club, and were happy to have the
experience of using their knowledge in a real situation. We led the other three groups up the mountain
that day and only had three kids get poked!
I’d like to spend a little time
talking about the importance of teaching our children to live in the world we
are in…teaching them to dance with the devil’s club so to speak, so when we
aren’t there to hold their hand and literally guide them around the thorny
areas, they will know what to do and how to act. There are many aspects of today’s world that
are like that part of the hike…an amazing and beautiful old growth forest scattered
with sharp spines that can cause pain and discomfort. Our job as parents is to equip our children
with the knowledge of the gospel and teach them correct principles so they can easily
navigate through the world we live in.
Richard G Scott said, “Principles are
anchors of safety. They are like the steel anchors a mountaineer uses to
conquer otherwise impossible cliffs. They will help you have confidence in new
and unfamiliar circumstances. They will provide you protection in life’s storms
of adversity." ("The Power of Correct Principles", Ensign, May
1993, 32)
President David O. McKay shared some basic
principles we need to teach our children.
“The first and most important inner quality you can instill in a child
is faith in God. The first and most
important action a child can learn is obedience. And the most powerful tool you
have with which to teach is love.” (See Instructor, Vol. 84, Dec. 1949, p. 620.) President Brigham Young added that “we should
never permit ourselves to do anything that we are not willing to see our
children do. We should set them an example
that we wish them to imitate.” (Journal of Discourses, 14:192.)
One of the best ways we have to teach
our children faith is to demonstrate our faith in their lives. Our children need to see us on our knees,
praying for guidance and expressing gratitude to Heavenly Father. They need to see us being reverent during
sacrament meeting…and not playing games on our phones. They need to see us studying the scriptures,
paying our tithing, having regular family home evenings, and doing our visiting
and home teaching. They also need to see
us striving to attend all of our church meetings.
The second principle President McKay
shared was teaching children obedience. Like
the expert who taught the 3rd graders how to navigate through the
devil’s club without being hurt, we can teach our children that in life there
are laws and rules that when followed can bring peace and happiness and when
disregarded, can bring pain and discomfort.
Most people find it easy and logical to obey physical laws like stopping
at a red light or not touching a hot stove, because they know the consequences of
breaking these laws can be immediate and severe. However, many of those same people feel
confined or restricted by spiritual laws, or commandments. Obeying commandments actually frees our
spirits and brings numerous blessings. In
1 Nephi 17:3 it says “And if it so be that the children of men keep the
commandments of God he doth nourish them, and strengthen them, and provide
means whereby they can accomplish the thing which he has commanded them”.
The third basic principle President
McKay shared was the necessity of love. When
we show our love and appreciation for one another at home, we invite the spirit
into our homes. Expanding upon that
statement, an article in the Reader’s Digest states, “A child should learn not
merely to love, but to be a loving person—to make love his stance in the world.
‘Love’ may come and go, but a loving person, like the sun itself, never loses
his or her sustaining warmth.” (Reader’s Digest, June 1981, p. 164.)
One of the last commandments the Lord gave to his disciples before he
was crucified is found in John 13:34-35.
It says, “A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another;
as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. By this shall all men know
that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.”
Building strong family relationships
is another way to teach our children how to love and be loving people as adults. Dr. Nick Stinnett of the University of
Nebraska shared these six points on the characteristics of strong families.
1. A strong family spends a
significant amount of time together while playing, working, eating, or in recreation.
Although family members all have outside interests, they find adequate time to
spend together.
2. Strong families have a high degree
of commitment to each family member, as indicated not only by the time spent
together, but also by their ability to work together in a common cause.
3. Strong families have good
communication patterns, as indicated by the time spent listening and speaking
to each other in conversation.
4. Strong families have a high degree
of religious orientation.
5. Strong families have the ability
to deal with crises in a positive way because they have spent time together,
are committed to each other, and have good communication patterns.
6. Strong family members frequently
give compliments to each other which are genuine and not superficial. (See “In
Search of Strong Families,” in Building Family Strengths: Blueprints for
Action, ed. Nick Stinnett, et al., Lincoln: University of Nebraska Press, 1979,
pp. 23–30.)
These characteristics are a wonderful
guideline for creating the kind of bonds within our families that will last
through the eternities.
I learned a great lesson during that
three day/two night camping trip with 45 third graders. I was reminded that we have living prophets,
scriptures, temples, families, and the restored gospel here on the earth to
guide us, teach us, and protect us from the evils of the world. Heavenly Father gave us these things for our
benefit and learning, because he loves us. When I first saw the thick forest of devil’s
club I was going to have to hike through, I immediately started looking for
ways to avoid that part of the trip. What I found by following the guide through
the thorns, was a breathtaking and beautiful old growth forest I would have
surely missed if I had let fears guide me. Fear is the opposite of faith, and
if we live with fear as our guide, we will miss out on the beauty and
opportunities of the world around us.
